The Problem With....

The long awaited cabinet re-shuffle by singer and chirpy cockney Joe Brown has been announced today.

Brown's long awaited announcement was greeted with a mixture of excitement and disdain as he announced:

1. The photo of his daughter will be moved to the mantelpiece, leaving room for his open university degree (Humanities) certificate.

2. The ornament which was broke during a wild rock n roll party is to be replaced by a framed certificate awarded to Joe by Nelson Mandela for his outstanding mark in his advanced drivers test.

3. Joe's longest serving member of the cabinet, the Diploma in Carpentry has been sensationally moved to the attic, with his newest award, the Confined Spaces certificate (attendance only) taking its place.

An insider who didn't want to be identified said this morning that Brown was satisfied his re-shuffle would meet with the approval of the electorate, but warned of tough times ahead.

Kindest Regards,

Mufrap El Nibor.

Hello there,

I was sat here wondering what I would and could do if I found £1000 and came up with the following ways to spend your wad:

1. Hand it in to the police.
2. Keep it and donate the wad to a charity.
3. Share my good fortune with my family and friends.
4. Secretly leave it somewhere for someone less privelaged than me.
5. Gamble it all away in one fell swoop in the hope of at least doubling the size of your wad.
6. Buy a new lawnmower complete with a storm break multiplier.

Any other good ideas?

Kindest regards,

Mufrap.

A mate of mine once told me that he went to a Chaka Khan gig, and 'got off' with her after the gig.

I'm wondering if there are any other people out there who have been to a gig and 'got off' with the singer? I'm interested to hear. 

Kind regards,

Mufrap El Nibor.

Plumbers? bah!
When will they arrive
To fix my pipe,
To heat my house,
To make me happy,
To take my money?
Another hour apparently....

Good evening friends,

We were talking in the office today about words, and came up with a couple that we think YOU as fabulous people may want to use at some stage in a conversation.

This is based on trust obviously, but if you would kindly use them, we would be more than grateful.

The words to use today are:

Flocculent: which menas like tufts of wool...tufts...you know what I mean.

Super: Obvious

Quagmire: In something sticky type of thing.

I hope you enjoy using these words and if anyone would care to join our word or phrase club please do so.

Kindest Regards,

Mufrap El Nibor

Dear Friends,

We have this bloke in our office who looks like Ronnie Corbett....

Amazing don't you think?

Do any other of you chaps have any lookalikes in your offices or places of work?

Kindest Regards,

Mufrap.

Dearest friends,

Is it me, or do any other inhabitants of Blogland believe that Lionel Blair is a puff?

Can anyone also confirm that famed gardner Percy Thrower was also gay, I seem to remember reading somewhere that he was.

Kindest Regards,

Mufrap El Nibor.

Dear friends,

Can any intelligent person out there in Blogland, please tell why men and women are so bloody different, because I'm buggered if I can work it out!

Kindest Regards,

Mufrap El Nibor

Hello,

Mufrap El Nibor.

Guten Morgen my friends,

No reason the the German really other than I've been in work for less than an hour and so far the topics we've covered are:

1. Rory Gallagher.
2. Scissor Sisters gig in Glasgow last Sunday.
3. Richard Ashcroft. (gig on Wed)
4. Morrissey. (gig on Sat)
5. Malt whiskey.
6. Vodka.
7. The slosh (NOT connected with any of the above).
8. Lack of sleep.
9. Troublesome teenagers.
10. German helmets.
11. Britsh football teams in Europe.

Not bad is it? Anyone care to let us have their topics for discussion so far this morning?

By the by.....the Slosh is a popular dance in Scotland and the north of England at weddings and family do's in case any of you didn't know. I'm interested to know how many others of you out there, particularly in the London area have partaken of ther slosh, or maybe you prefer the 'Alley cat'?

Kindest regards,

Mufrap El Nibor.